What is this "me time" I seem to have found?

One of the most amazing things I've found, in the midst of everything that's been going on in my life, is that all of a sudden, I have this time to myself that I haven't had before.

I've spent my life up until now being the caretaker. After work, I've come home, picked up The Kid, took her out to dinner, and if there was any shopping to be done, I'd do that (leaving her either in the car if the weather was decent, or at some bench right inside the store, since she couldn't walk around that well), and then come home. The rest of the evening was spent either pecking away at the computer or flopped on the couch watching the TV.

Nowadays, after work, I go down and visit The Kid, and spend an hour or two with her until her dinner arrives. I make sure she's got something halfway edible to eat (volumes could be written about hospital food and the paper they're printed on would taste better), and then...amazingly enough...the rest of the evening is mine to do what I please.

This is a new experience for me.

In the past couple weeks, I've gone out to dinner most of the time, for sure, but I've also skipped dinner one night. Completely skipped it! I've gone to a baseball game (and will hopefully go to another one soon), I stopped at the grocery store and picked up the ingredients for a nice, simple meal. I've picked up a Battleship and had enough for dinner that night AND lunch the next day.

One night, a week or so ago, my feet were killing me. I knew I needed to soak 'em, but I was out of Epsom Salts. In the past, The Kid would throw a hissy fit if I needed to run out to the store at night, but there was no one here to make such a fuss. I hopped in the car, drove over to K-Mart, bought some Epsom Salts and a new tub to soak my feet in. In the past week or so, I've soaked 'em just about every night: Walking 2 to 4 miles each day can wear on the feet, after all.

I know, gentle reader, that you're reading this and you're saying to yourself, "so what?". To you, these things are nothing...it's part of everyday life. To me, however, it's the little things that I've never had the chance to do because of my role as caretaker to someone who's become so frightened of the world outside her door that she locked herself away...and took me with her, after a fashion.

Don't harbor any ill will to her, please. I don't. I stood by her and did these things by my own will, by my own choice. Nowadays, she's somewhere where maybe...just maybe...they can help her with problems that I can no longer help her with, even though I know she longs to come back here to her home and prison. It's just that the safety she found here once no longer exists. What I do, I do for her own good.

As for me? Unlike my Kid, I won't lock myself into this prison once the work day is done. I'll get home...eventutally.