Sunday, March 25, 2007

The further adventures of the modern bachelor

Since I was granted the status of "bachelor" seven-plus months ago, I've been dreading this day. I knew it would happen sometime. It was inevitable. Although it wasn't listed in one of Murphy's Laws directly, I know it's in there somewhere.

I've lost a button from one of my shirts, and I have no idea how to sew.

None whatsoever. I'm freakin' clueless in that department.

Well, maybe not totally clueless. I do know how to thread a needle...

I'm looking for a seamstress. If anyone knows how to replace a button from a shirt and wants to take pity on a poor, clueless stoopid guy, let me know.

It's not that big a deal, actually. It's the second button from the top on one of my shirts, and I can wear it open with a t-shirt underneath (and look damn good doing so in the process, if I may say so), so it's not that important. If you happen to be in the neighborhood and know how to sew, stop by.

Ice cream on me, afterwards. ;)

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

What a line! :) LOL I might just be knocking at your door, for a free ice cream. ;) LOLOL

I know how to sew, but am too lazy to sew buttons on my clothes, I just replace them...after all, it is fun to shop!!

Rene said...

I'm with Lorri ... I know a really good seamstress, she is called the Polo Outlet Store LOL

Anonymous said...

LOL, Rene. A man after my own heart. I can shop until I drop, very easily. Give me Macys, The Gap Outlet, etc., so many stores, so little time. LOL

I don't care, buttons are not meant for replacing...lolol...but, clothes are.

Shauna said...

I don't do ice cream. Substitute a good soy mocha in there and I'll start walking. :)

ProsePetals said...

Duuuuuuuuude

*sigh*

Y'know, I could say so many things here.

What I WILL say is this.

You *could* go buy a new shirt.
You *could* take a sewing class (not necessary for buttons or socks, btw).
You *could* take a cruise around the world.


OR.


You could go to your nearest laundry/dry cleaner. Broken/lost/fallen off buttons are their specialty, because through the laundering, buttons get effed up/broken whatever. There is this really cool machine they have for either 2-hole or 4-hole buttons that they usually replace gratis when running shirts through, or if independently, maybe a quarter at most.

Or, if you know the trick of the button machine, it's really easy. Needle, needler, thread, and about 8 pops through each hole.

Don't understand that?

Hand me the fucking shirt, Onie. *rolls eyes*

*grin*

Brought to you by egwuauum. Sounds about right for sewing a button. *sigh*

Shauna said...

*flicks bic for Prosey*

there ya go.

My vote is for shopping.

Anonymous said...

*sigh*

You know how to thread a needle but you don't know how to sew on a button?

*speechless*

Onestar said...

Lorri: Sure, c'mon over. Ice cream's on me. And no...to both you and Rene...I'm not getting a new shirt. I like this one.

Priestess: For you, anything. I'll even through a shot of espresso in it for ya.

*hands Prosey the shirt with a big grin*

And Squooshie, I always had to thread the needle for My Kid. She could see to sew, but had no patience to thread the needle...

Sterl said...

Oh my God...lol. Even I can do that. ;) I bet there's a simple online instruction booklet to sew a button. That sounds like a piece of humor right there. *grins* That is great, thanks for the laugh, even if at your expense. :P

Onestar said...

M'friend, I got you to laugh.
That's all that matters. :)

And I don't wanna hear it, Priestess.
I think it's funny as well...so I don't mind the laughter.

Rene said...

You could buy the exact same shirt, you know *nods*

And Sterl, I'm sure there is such a manual, and I'm really interested in seeing the disclaimers in it *ROFL*

Lorri said...

Here you go, instructions at your service, from ehow.com

http://www.ehow.com/how_4604_sew-button.html

LOL

Seriously...exact instructions.