It's Nature's Way of telling you something's wrong...

You've probably heard of the comic book character Spider-Man.

One of his super-powers is "Spider Sense", a precognitive sensation which warns him of impending danger. I doubt that real spiders have this ability. If they did, they wouldn't be squashed quite so easily.

It's my firm belief that we all have some form of "spider sense", warning us when there's a problem, we're in danger, or we've just eaten something really nasty and will be spending the next 20 minutes on the shitter and have, as my love calls it, burning buttholeitis.

It seems somehow fitting that my own early warning system comes in the form of a song, which starts to play on an endless loop in my head. Naturally, it's a song you've no doubt ever heard before, given that it's by a group whose popularity waned after the 70's. Spirit wrote a song called Nature's Way, and the chorus get's stuck in my head just like Spider-Man's "spider sense" goes off. Alas, there's no wavy lines emanating from my skull and half my face doesn't turn into a mask.


It's nature's way of telling you something's wrong
It's nature's way of telling you in a song
It's nature's way of receiving you
It's nature's way of retrieving you
It's nature's way of telling you
Something's wrong

That song was stuck in my head for the longest time close to three years ago, until I realized something was wrong then, and did something about it. For the last few days, it's been there again...

I mentioned in my last blog that I was having car problems. My car isn't very happy at the moment: It sputters and chokes whenever you turn it on, doesn't have too much power pulling out and the service engine soon light is blinking. It's been on for awhile: One of the O2 sensors has needed replaced. We knew about that, but this is something completely new.

Normally, I'd have Travis or Matt look at the car. They're both excellent car guys and I trust them with the old girl, but right now, I'm 250 miles from home in the middle of Indiana.

I'm the first to admit, I have more than my fair share of fears, worries and concerns. One of my oldest fears is being trapped somewhere and not able to make it home. I've had that one since I was a little kid. One night, while at Monroeville Mall...I couldn't have been more than 4 or 5...we were there at closing time and they were announcing over the PA system that the mall was closing in five minutes.

I started to panic. I remember pulling at My Kid's hand (long before role reversal would take effect) telling her we had to hurry or else we'd get locked in and not make it home. She just laughed a little and said they wouldn't lock us in.

Years later, we were out shopping and on our way home on the other side of the river when we heard on the radio that barges had broken loose near the Braddock Dam. They were flowing freely down the river, hitting bridge abutments, and the police started to close the bridges to traffic, in case they would do some damage.

I told Mum that we had to get across to "our" side of the river no matter what. She drove like a madwoman (part of my road rage comes from her...the rest of it from my brother, but that's another story for another time) through traffic passing two bridges that had already closed before reaching a third, moments before police shut it down. I never mentioned to her my irrational fear. She just did what I asked, not questioning, just doing.

I know home wouldn't be going anywhere, deep down inside. The rational portion of my brain understand and accepts this as fact. However, fears are never rational.

The possibility exists that my car may...or perhaps will...break down at some point on my 250 mile journey back home today, leaving me stranded in the middle of God-knows-where, unable to get home.

Julie knows about this, and has told me that if it does happen, she and Travis will come get me.

It's the thought that I won't be able to make it home on my own, that there's a bit of unpredictability, that scares the shit out of me.

It's a little after 8 in the morning. Right now, I'm going to the lobby and have some breakfast. One of the advantages of this job is, when I'm staying at the hotel to work, they comp my room and I get free breakfast (as well as Internet) out of the deal. I'll eat, check in with the hotel staff to ensure everything's working properly, come back to the room, pack my last few things away, change into jeans, check out, and go to the car.

That much is certain. That much is guaranteed.

After that...I don't know what's going to happen. Maybe the car won't start, having chugged the last couple days here in Kokomo, and decided to do the right thing and die before I try and get on the road. Maybe it'll try to make it into the intersection and stop in a most inconvenient spot. There's no interstate between Kokomo and Lafayette, where I get on 65 to head North. It's all country road. Maybe it'll stop there, or stop when while I'm on the interstate.

Maybe it'll make it home, but somehow, Nature's Way is telling me that's not going to happen.