And so it goes

This will be, most likely, the final entry in The Journal of Onestar.

When these words appear, gentle reader, Julie and I will be taking our vows to become Husband and Wife. Three years and three days after we met online, we're getting married. And yes, I'm typing this in advance. I may be good, but there's no way I can blog and say "I Do" at the same time, and even if I could, I doubt it'd go over very well.

I know I've ended this blog in the past, only to come back to it again. My production here has seriously dropped off over the years, so this shouldn't come as much of a surprise. I started this mostly as a place to vent frustrations, share fears, have an outlet for things that were going on in my life.

2006, when this blog started in earnest, marked the beginning of the most tumultuous time in my life. My aunt had passed away the previous October and my mother, whom I'd spent years caring for, started her decline in earnest. I'd spent months watching a strong woman unravel at the seams, her depression grow into the onset of dementia and ultimately lead to her going into a nursing home.

Two years later, I lost a job through no one's fault but my own, one I'd had for nearly nine years. It was something I loved, even if it did have its minor detractions. Out of work in the midst of one of the worst recessions this country's faced with few if any good prospects, the outlook was bleak...until I met Julie.

At my worst, I found my best.

The story of our love has unfolded here, shared for my friends and foes alike to see, and both have visited many times. Yeah, I was out of work, but I spent the Summer of 2008 traveling back and forth from Pittsburgh to DeKalb to see her, each trip a little longer, each time neither wanting to part. We both knew what we wanted, we both knew it would lead to this day, but we were willing to take our time and make sure it was done correctly, properly.

Right now, I'm standing in a tuxedo, my best man, best friend and a man who has been more of a brother to me than my real brothers standing by my side as I watch her walk toward me. In a sense, this is merely a formality: Many already think we are married, and in my heart, well...

In my heart I've been married to her for awhile now, and she has been married to me.

Things are a little better today than when I first met her three years ago. I have a stable, full-time job again, doing what I love to do. I have a family here whom I get to come home to daily and who like and care for me. We have a place, and we're talking about finding our own home together here.

I'm a Pittsburgher in my heart, but my home is with Julie. We're here in DeKalb for the foreseeable future, not only because we have good jobs here, but also because our family is here. Our grandson is here. How can we leave?

Onestar was born 20 years ago, a character for a game that I kept around, tweaked, gave a history and a life to, forged into an online character that led me to meet many good friends and some good adventures along the way. The only problem is, you can't have Onestar without the "One" at the beginning, and that's something I am not. Not any longer.

So it's time to put this character, this persona, this Onestar behind me. Hey, 20 years as one character ain't bad.

But it is time to move on.

I'll leave this blog here, maybe for a day, maybe forever. I doubt I'll update it, but as I learned, I won't say "never". Never say never. The Universe doesn't like it when you say that.

And who knows? I'll likely blog again. Julie seems to like it when I write, seeing what I have to say, and I admit, I still like to blog, share good things and bad with my friends every now and then. It just won't be here.

There is a certain melancholy to writing this last blog entry. I spent a long time writing The Journal of Onestar, in one form or another, with friends and alone. If life is a book, then this chapter has closed, and it's just time to move onto another. When you see me again, I'll no longer be a bachelor, I'll be a husband, to the most amazing, wonderful, beautiful, sexy, caring, and loving woman.

My Julie, my angel.

So until we meet again, somewhere down the line, this is farewell. It's been a helluva run, these past 20 years. Time to let Onestar take a nap. He earned it.

Goodbye.